Howdy!
I read the first page! Skimmed posts on other pages.
Seems you are virtually a beginner for purchasing, owning, using, maintaining and living aboard a "trawler" type of boat. There are many items that will arise which are completely different than sail boat experience.
You mentioned a large boat is not necessary and that you have looked into a Tollycraft 40'er. I like Tollys!
My recommendations; i.e., my 0.02 sense: LOL
1. Purchase a 34' to 40' tri cabin style boat. That design offers all kinds of interior and exterior room. And, in that size range self handling is pretty easy. I strongly recommend full access side decks. You'll most understand that statement when you dock single handed.
2. Have a flying bridge. Great place to pilot from. Lots more outdoor relaxation room. You can still have a solid overhead-cover for solar panels.
3. Make sure there is fully equipped galley. If you spend much time aboard... that is necessity.
4. Twin engines make handling a boat in close quarters much easier than a single. Twins also make for redundant propulsion source if per chance one fails.
5. A fully equipped, roomy head [or two] is another needed item. Guess why!
6. Swim step. For many reasons and uses.
7. Generator... when you need it - you need it!
There are sooooo many other items to suggest. Those 7 "hints" I mention are some of the most important in my opinion.
Oh yes... here's two more: Get a fiberglass boat that has little to no wood to care for on the exterior. And, for safety sake have plenty of guard rails all around on exterior.
Good Luck!
Happy Boat-Search Daze! Art