Humor
- Thread starter Keith
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The friendliest place on the web for anyone who enjoys boating.
If you have answers, please help by responding to the unanswered posts.
If you have answers, please help by responding to the unanswered posts.
RT Firefly
Enigma
Greetings,
Things are too quiet...
Things are too quiet...
IMO - Having owned many trucks of each kind... Flip a coin, get one in good condition and do your maintenance! Same goes for boats!!
I am not prejudice on "used" vehicle brand. Currently we have 1967 Buick Wildcat, 1985 1 ton 4wd Chevy truck, 1998 Ford 4wd SUV, 2014 Lincoln MKT/SUV 4wd. All are good vehicles. All very well maintained!
And of course - 1996 Tiffin Allegro on GM chassis... named "Sweetie"!
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Alright Art! All domestic vehicles! And a domestic boat too!
We have all domestic cars but the boat is from Taiwan.
RT Firefly
Enigma
O C Diver
Guru
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Senior question of the day:
What is a Philips Screwdriver?
Milk of Magnesia and Vodka.
Ted
RT Firefly
Enigma
Greetings,
Mr. OC. Nice one. Hadn't heard that.
Mr. OC. Nice one. Hadn't heard that.
boathealer
Guru
I heard that was called a "Pile Driver".
RT Firefly
Enigma
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porman
Guru
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I used to be a factory trained Lotus (car) technician. Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious. And it was true.
RT Firefly
Enigma
Greetings,
Mr. p. British engineering (automotive). Now, THAT'S a joke right there.
Mr. p. British engineering (automotive). Now, THAT'S a joke right there.
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I loved my 1965 Lotus Elan. When it ran.
Owned it in the 70's when young as a daily driver, in the wet PNW. Commuted from Tacoma to Seattle in about 40 minutes every day.
The pop up headlight would open and close randomly when at a stoplight from low vacuum.
The engine would die from driving in heavy rain.
Heater was intermittent.
The erector set soft top had to be assembled and the side curtains didn't keep the rain out.
I hated the rubber donut U joints. Broke constantly and they were a PITA to replace.
Did I mention that I loved that car. It was like wearing a car or putting on a car. It was small and tight but comfortable. There was nothing on the car that didn't have a function. No wasted space. That was Colin Chapmans philosophy.
That car cornered like it was on rails. I could take a 90 degree corner at an intersection at 50 - 60 MPH and it would just turn, no sliding, no fishtailing.
Oh and the gals loved that car too. I was single.
Did I mention I loved that car?
Attachments
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O C Diver
Guru
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No discussion of British engineering would be complete without referencing some jokes about:
Lucas Prince of Darkness
Ted
caltexflanc
Guru
As I was in the process of leaving the Nest for good, my father took me aside to give me some life lessons, about four of them. The first few were about character related things, the last one was "Never buy a British car". I probably violated a few of them in some way, but never that one.
That really made an impression on me as he was fond of buying all sorts of oddball cars over the years... including a Hillman Minx, as well as a Crosley, Nash Rambler wagon, Studebaker, NSU Prinz, the original Corvair, and two, count 'em two Chevy Vegas. His brother was similar.
That really made an impression on me as he was fond of buying all sorts of oddball cars over the years... including a Hillman Minx, as well as a Crosley, Nash Rambler wagon, Studebaker, NSU Prinz, the original Corvair, and two, count 'em two Chevy Vegas. His brother was similar.
menzies
Guru
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Mostly because US auto manufacturers didn't build small, fun, good handling, convertible roadsters in the 60's and 70's. Except the Corvette.
The british cars were not perfect or great, but with a few mods, turned them into great handling cars. They were better than anything else if road handling and performance was a priority.
I owned a bunch of british cars in the 60's and 70's. MG, Triumph, Sunbeam and Lotus.
Always hoped for a US made roadster. Opel GT and Fieros were hard tops and mediocre.
And, finally in 2007, Pontiac introduced the Solstice, a true roadster. Pontiacs death kept production low, but there is a bunch of enthusiasts keeping the Solstice on the road. They came well equipped in the handling department, reliable and a lot more comfortable than any 60's era british roadster.
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O C Diver
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My best friend bought a used Triumph TR3 when he got his driver's license. It was a total POS.
Another friend had '66 Jaguar XKE with the V12 engine. Lots of fun to go for a ride in with the smoothest engine I can remember. I think he spent as much time working on it as driving it.
British cars fall in the category of "Only Rent, Never Own ".
Ted
Toki
Senior Member
I think ownership of a classic British car is all about the fun, coolness, and being unique, despite the whole reliability thing. My first car was a bug eye Sprite. Didn't run very often, but when it did it got me dates! Then more recently was the 66 Spitfire. Although it may be a misnomer to call that spit British as the body, bonnet and parts of the frame were about all that was left of the original build. The V8, 5 speed, IRS, and just about everything else were cannibalized off US makes.
This is from before I was born but my father still had the car and my mother still fussed about it when I was a child. When everyone was running to buy VW Beetles he didn't like them and ran the other way, purchasing an Austin. I vaguely remember it even had a small sunroof. It was the Morris Minor decades earlier. Ugly, small, underpowered but a novelty.
About the fastest I've ever driven a car was 145 mph in a 1958 Jag XK150, in 1969.
It was a beast but fun, fun, fun!
RT Firefly
Enigma
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Wifey B: 2020, the year of the first real US built sports car.
Are we talking C-8? Yes it really is a game changer.
I think the C-8 is more than a sports car. It's a world class supercar.
I consider the Ford GT from 2004 the first real US made mass produced supercar.
If you are not talking C-8, as Emily Litella would say "never mind".
Wifey B: Yes, the C8. Others have been hot cars, have been pony cars, have been lots of things but not true sports cars and beyond. Hubby and I have never desired a Corvette but we love this one. We just figure our Corvette fanatic girlfriend Jenn would kill us for jumping on the bandwagon. She's driven Corvette's for years and she had one of these ordered the first day it was possible. She'd told the dealer well before and he said, "But you don't even know the price." She said she didn't care. Old mustangs and Vettes were cute as have been other cars, but finally they got it right.
Wifey B: Yes, the C8. Others have been hot cars, have been pony cars, have been lots of things but not true sports cars and beyond. Hubby and I have never desired a Corvette but we love this one. We just figure our Corvette fanatic girlfriend Jenn would kill us for jumping on the bandwagon. She's driven Corvette's for years and she had one of these ordered the first day it was possible. She'd told the dealer well before and he said, "But you don't even know the price." She said she didn't care. Old mustangs and Vettes were cute as have been other cars, but finally they got it right.
Year ago, I tried getting my wife a convertible Vette for her B-Day. Went to take it on a drive. Found I could hardly fit. Instead she got a 4wd, dual moon roof Lincoln MKT [much more comfortable and utilitarian]; 365 hp Twin Turbo EcoBoost 3.5 L/213 CI engine with 6F 55 6-speed auto trans. Floor the gas pedal at 35 mph and wheels briefly break loose. Very quick, cool, luxurious, comfortable vehicle! IMO - a real sleeper!
FF
Guru
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[FONT="]12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres ever aired on British TV and radio[/FONT][FONT="]Â [/FONT]
[FONT="]
1. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - 'This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother.'
2. [/FONT][FONT="]New Zealand Rugby Commentator - 'Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him.'
3. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - 'And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria . I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!'
4. Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 - 'Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew.'
5. US PGA Commentator - 'One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them ..... Oh my god !! What have I just said??'
6. Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on 'Time Team Live' said: 'You'd eat beaver if you could get it.'
7. A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, 'So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?' Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!
8. Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: 'Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday.'
9. Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said: 'There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this. '
10 Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports: 'Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets.'
11. Michael Buerk on watching Philippa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage remarked: 'They seem cold out there, they're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts.'
12. Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open: 'Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny, other weeks he prefers to do it by himself.' [/FONT]
[FONT="]
1. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - 'This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother.'
2. [/FONT][FONT="]New Zealand Rugby Commentator - 'Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him.'
3. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - 'And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria . I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!'
4. Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 - 'Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew.'
5. US PGA Commentator - 'One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them ..... Oh my god !! What have I just said??'
6. Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on 'Time Team Live' said: 'You'd eat beaver if you could get it.'
7. A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, 'So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?' Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!
8. Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: 'Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday.'
9. Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on Look North said: 'There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this. '
10 Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports: 'Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets.'
11. Michael Buerk on watching Philippa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage remarked: 'They seem cold out there, they're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts.'
12. Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open: 'Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny, other weeks he prefers to do it by himself.' [/FONT]
caltexflanc
Guru
A little bit of do as I say not what I do eh?
The Hillman predated the advice by 16 years. So he spoke from experience to some degree. He lived by that credo rigorously the rest of his 93 years.
