Excellent post especially this first paragraph.
With thrusters, I don't think they're automatically a crutch, but some people use them as one. They rely heavily on the thrusters without ever getting an understanding of how the boat moves (I have the same complaint about joystick controls). In my mind, you learn to control the boat, then you add in the thrusters to make it do things you can't otherwise do easily or at all.
I will comment that learning how to handle your boat backing in a variety of conditions and for some distance adds a very valuable tool to your kit. Once comfortable with the technique you can often avoid trying to trun 180 degrees in tight or challenging situation. Just don't try to learn the skills in tight quarters or challenging situations.
Time is important. Don't let it be your enemy. We're mostly recreational boaters here, retired pros or not. Waiting for conditions to improve is usually just a matter of patience.
We saw a perfect example of failure to exercise patience last week. It happened at James Island Marine Park in the San Juans. For those not familiar with the dock a couple of pics attached.
We were sided tied bow out on the outer end. Inshore of us was what looked to be a Monk 36, or something quite similar, side tied bow in clear at the inshore end of the dock. Both tied on the side with the pilings. Watching him maneuver I'm saying a single with no thruster. The tide was running strong that morning pinning our boat and theirs against the dock. I don't know how fast, no way to measure it, I'm guessing 2+ knots, likely more. In other words a very challenging situation for the Monk.
We both started preparing to get underway about the same time, him a few minutes ahead of us. And here's where is lack of patience bit him in the backside. He chose not to wait for us to move and tried to depart. That was his first error in judgement.
His second was to attempt to depart going forward. This meant trying to spring the bow out without damaging the swim step and RIB mounted on the swim step. And pull that off in very close quarters. He hooked the bow of his RIB on the pilings and ripped it loose. I don't know what failed, attachment on the RIB or mount on the swim step, but now it's hanging in the water. And to make matters worse the snagging of the rib swung his bow towards the foot ramp overpass. He did mange to avoid the bow going under the overpass but still insisted on moving forward rather than backing, now his stern and nearly his fly bridge are under the overpass before he fully recovers and maneuvers away.
Had he simply given us a few minutes more time to depart he could have walked his boat to the outer end of the dock then from there easily backed out. That in my opinion is fact.
After the incident armchair analysis notes had he used the 128' dock with our 45' on the offshore end and his 36' on the inshore end leaving something on the order of 40+ ft between us he could have used a spring line to get the stern out then back with enthusiasm ti get clear of us. A dicey choice of course but better than trying to depart bow first and having to turn 180 degrees in tight quarters with current against him.
Back to part of the thread drift, thrusters. Would a thruster have helped? Maybe. Maybe not. They are too likely to trip out when worked hard.
I will give he and his crew credit for how they handled the situation. No screaming and yelling. A simple loud call out from the couple on the stern the RIB was about to hit, then trying to contain it. As soon as he was clear of the overpass and nearly lined up to leave his wife went to the flybirdge to complete the departure so he could head to the cockpit and assist with securing the RIB.